VaCP FAQ's

To find out more about Collaborative Divorce:

Discuss Collaborative Divorce with your spouse, partner, or the other parent. See if you both want to explore it as an option for resolving your conflicts. Consider joint consultation with one of the allied mental health or financial professionals, who can meet with both of you to explore this option. Note: An attorney is bound by his/her professional ethics to meet with only one of you.

To address legal questions or concerns and how they may be addressed in the Collaborative Divorce Process, each party should consult their own Collaboratively trained lawyer.

Separating and divorcing are emotional events. Either party may be struggling with the emotional impact of the separation or divorce. And, if you need help communicating with each other about small or large decisions, then both parties can consult with a Collaborative Coach for communication coaching, to learn strategies and develop resources to better navigate the emotional currents of the Process.

If either parent has concerns about the impact of the separation or divorce on the children or desires guidance with developing a parenting plan for the children that meet the emotional and developmental needs of the children, both should consult with Collaborative Child Specialist together.

Both parties benefit from learning about the family’s finances and understanding their future needs and resources, so both parties should visit and consult with a Collaborative Financial Specialist together.

To start a Collaborative Divorce:

Cooperation and agreement between you and your spouse to seek a Collaborative Divorce is essential to a successful Process. Attorneys, by the ethics of their profession, may not meet with both parties to initiate the Process, so you may each meet with your own Collaboratively trained lawyer to start the Process.

And, if you would like to explore the potential benefit of a Collaborative Divorce together, then a joint meeting with one of the neutral mental health or financial professionals is an option. The Process can be introduced and questions answered, at which point you can proceed to assemble your Collaborative Team or each meet with your own Collaboratively trained lawyer, then assemble your Collaborative Team.

Once the Collaborative Team is assembled, they communicate with each other, ensure everyone is on the same page with the parties, and schedule the initial Collaborative meeting.

At the initial Collaborative meeting the parties sign the Collaborative Participation Agreement, share their interest, goals and needs, and begin planning their family’s “road map” to resolution.

With their team’s assistance, parties identify their pressing needs and the questions they need to answer to reach a resolution that works for everyone in their family. Then, the team and the parties select when and how often they need to meet to resolve all of their parenting and financial issues.

Often, prior to the initial Collaborative meeting and throughout the process, the parties meet with their shared or individual Collaborative Coach to address communication issues and emotional undercurrents so that they are at their best to discuss, evaluate and make decisions in the legal and financial meetings.

Also, prior to the initial Collaborative meeting and throughout the process, the parties may meet together with a financial specialist, to begin to identify short and long term financial goals and determine the types of information and documentation needed.

The number of meetings with one or more of the professionals is determined on a case-by-case basis in accordance with the parties’ needs.

A Collaborative case proceeds in an orderly, planned, and agreed upon manner.

Once the Collaborative Team is assembled, they communicate with each other, ensure everyone is on the same page with the parties and schedule the initial Collaborative meeting.

At the initial Collaborative meeting everyone thoroughly reviews and the parties sign the Collaborative Participation Agreement. The parties share their interest, goals and needs, and with the team begin planning their family’s “road map” to resolution.

With their team’s assistance, the parties identify their pressing needs and the questions they will need to answer to reach a resolution that works for everyone in their family.

And then, the team and the parties select what topics needs need to be addressed first, and schedule when and how often they will to meet to resolve all of their parenting and financial issues.

Often, prior to the initial Collaborative meeting and throughout the Process, the parties meet with their shared or individual Collaborative Coach to address communication issues and emotional undercurrents so that they are at their best to discuss, evaluate and make decisions in the legal and financial meetings.

Also, prior to the initial Collaborative meeting and throughout the Process, the parties may meet together with a financial specialist, to begin to identify short and long term financial goals and determine the types of information and documentation needed.

The number of meetings with one or more of the professionals is determined on a case-by-case basis in accordance with the parties’ needs.

Once the parties have agreement on their parenting and financial issues, their Collaborative lawyers draft the comprehensive settlement agreement and the clients and needed team members meet to review and finalize it for the parties to sign.

At the appropriate time the Collaboratively trained lawyers prepare the necessary divorce papers and file them with the court. By working together in the Collaborative Divorce Process the divorce may be concluded without unnecessary delay or expense.

The Collaborative Process may be utilized for most family concerns (and many civil or commercial disputes):

  • Separation
  • Temporary agreements
  • Custody or visitation
  • Child support
  • Spousal support
  • Changing support, custody or visitation
  • Post Divorce matters
  • Pre-marital agreements
  • Unmarried partners

A Collaborative Lawyer is hired to help you settle your case without using the threat of going to court:

  • The Collaborative Lawyer is trained to work in a non-adversarial way with you and as a part of a Collaborative team.
  • The Collaborative Lawyer is hired only as a settlement attorney and will not represent you in a contested court battle against your spouse or the other party. If the Collaborative Process terminates, they will assist their clients to transition to litigation lawyers.
  • By removing the “threat of going to court” as a weapon in the negotiations, each party, each lawyer, coach, financial neutral or child specialist gets to focus all their efforts on helping you create an agreement that meets the interest, goals and needs of everyone in the family.
  • Each party has their own Collaborative Lawyer and each party instructs their lawyer to adhere to the Collaborative commitments and principles to which both parties agree when they sign the Collaborative Participation Agreement. The Collaborative Lawyers will be transparent, share all information and advice, not take advantage of mistakes, give candid legal advice even if it favors the other party, respect the interests, goals and needs of both parties, and the decisions they make.
  • Your Collaborative Lawyer listens to you; is your legal advisor; shares legal advice; helps you make informed decisions; supports and guides you during Collaborative meetings; and helps you evaluate your options.
  • The Collaborative Lawyers by contract are instructed to work together to guide the Collaborative Divorce; help gather, share and explain the information needed for reaching resolutions; help you and the team brainstorm and evaluate options; advise you (and share with the team) about the law and legal effect of your decisions.
  • Collaborative Lawyers draft the final parenting plans, the property settlement agreements and contracts, deeds and orders needed to implement the parties’ agreements.
  • The Collaborative Lawyers work together to prepare, file and finalize the no-fault divorce and any additional uncontested matters such as custody or retirement orders.
  • Collaborative Coaches help the parties to manage emotions and maintain and improve communication and conflict resolution skills.
  • Collaborative Coaches, though trained as counselors or therapists, do not provide therapeutic services to Collaborative clients. They can make referrals to therapists if such services are needed or desired.
  • Collaborative Coaches assist the parents with developing a parenting plan for their children with input from the Collaborative Child Specialist.

Collaborative Child Specialists are the “voice of the children.” They meet with the parents. They usually meet with each child. And then, they share, with the parents, insight about how the children are doing so the parenting agreements best meet the needs of the children. They have training and experience in child development so can educate the parents about how the parenting plan can address the developmental needs of each child.

  • The Collaborative Financial Specialist helps the team have neutral conversations about the money, the property division, budgets and support needs all of which can be highly emotional issues.
  • The Financial Specialist can efficiently gather from the clients the needed financial documentation, organize and summarize and present it to the Collaborative lawyers and clients in a neutral manner.
  • As settlement options are explored, the Financial Specialist may evaluate how the proposed divisions address the clients’ financial goals and how they may or may not provide for each client in the future.
  • A Financial Specialist can educate the spouse who does not have the same knowledge and understanding of the family finances so that both clients are capable of participating in brainstorming options, evaluating and making the financial decisions needed to reach a resolution that is acceptable to both.
  • A Financial Specialist has credentials such as Certified Financial Planner (CFP) or Certified Public Accountant (CPA) and may also hold a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA) certificate. The financial specialist may address such topics as income tax and cash flow issues, executive compensation, stock options, cost basis analysis, retirement planning, estate planning, education expenses funding, investment allocation and income generation, and risk management issues such as life, disability and property and casualty insurance.
  • When parties elect to utilize the Collaborative Divorce Process, both of them sign a Collaborative Participation Agreement which is a contract, a binding agreement, which sets out the guiding principles of the Collaborative Process so the each party is fully familiar with the do’s and don’ts required of each of them and their Collaborative Lawyers and additional team members.
  • In their Collaborative Participation Agreement each party commits to
    • share complete financial information and documents with each other, whether requested or not;
    • hire the Collaborative lawyers and other professionals only to give advice and help work out an agreement, not to litigate in court. If either person files a court case before all the issues are settled, the Collaborative lawyers, coaches, child and financial specialists cannot be involved in it;
    • to work with mutual respect, correct mistakes and only take action upon mutual agreement.
  • Prior to signing the Collaborative Participation Agreement each Collaborative Lawyer individually and with the Team goes over the document with the client, so that client’s make an informed decision to commit to the Collaborative Process.
  • Signing the Collaborative Participation Agreement starts the Collaborative Divorce.
  • In addition to the Collaborative Participation Agreement each client signs an individual “retainer & fee agreements with a Collaborative Process” addendum with their own Collaborative Lawyer.
  • Also, the clients sign retainer & fee agreements with additional team member such as their coach, child specialist and/or financial specialist.

Collaborative Divorce

To find out more about Collaborative Divorce:

To find out more about Collaborative Divorce:

To find out more about Collaborative Divorce:

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